'morning! Yesterday there was the Janken Taikai!
I regrettably lost but I was happy I wear the cute outfit prepared specifically for the Janken lol
How was it? (￣▽￣)
Also, it was announced the senbatsu for the 38th single, I entered senbatsu with the Janken but I could enter senbatsu being chosen for the first time.
I’m really full of gratitude.
Sayaya and Renacchi that were next to me were called before, and even Tomu and Juri, it’s pitiful but I cried alone…
Because in that moment I thought in spite of all the chances I got, I didn’t achieve any result, after that I did unrelated activities, I was left behind by the member of my same generation and my kouhais and the tears didn’t stop.
And while I was showing the embarrassing myself who was sobbing like that, my name was called…
The incalculable frustration I experienced until now, the disappointment I faced, I clearly remembered the anger like a flashback… It was weird.
But you know, in the same moment all the things I did until now are connected in one only dream and thinking about that I spilled too many tears. Tears of happiness.
And then All the faces of the persons who always support me and come to the handshake events came in my mind. In my heart I thought “Everyone, I did it!”, “I grabbed it with everyone!” ^ ^
Surely, you all were anxious during this announcement. And if I hadn’t been chosen, there would have been pesons who would have come to the handshake events apologizing and blaming theirselves… Always when there is an announcement I think I absolutely don’t let you feel like that. So this time I want everyone to laugh a lot about the frustration we experienced until now ^ ^
There were a lot of members who came out and ran up to me and were happy for me though everyone had a lot of things to think. To have such mates is my pride too.
One last thing, it doesn’t matter how many times I say it, I’m really full of happiness for having been chosen for the senbatsu this time.
I receive this big chance again. I want to answer at 120% to your feelings and show some results.
But the place I’m aiming at it’s still ahead! I have to do more efforts, more than now, to reach it…
By a blessed circumstance, I have the privilege to do what I like so I’ll learn a lot and make them my things, and one day I want to be chosen for a 16 members senbatsu and become a presence who lead AKB.
And I want to enter senbatsu with all the 12th generation! During the announcement, the myself who cried like that with confusion and happiness, watching Tomu’s and Juri’s face, the tears I was spilling changed a bit their meaning. The presence of member of the same generation is such a big thing. So the moment of the debut of a senbatsu with all the 12th generation is secretly my dream forever.
Maybe a long time will be needed to reach that dream, but from now on too, take care of Tano Yuuka m(__)m
I always write my honest feelings via mail but this time I wrote them on G+. It’s a long post but thank you very much for having read it till here.